Pages Menu
Categories Menu

Posted on Jan 26, 2009 in Activism, Beltway Politics, Conservatism

Taking The Air Out Of The Dirigible

I was driving to the Shoppette to buy some booze.

Hardin County, being the inexplicably dry, or “Clean” county that it is, often forces this inconvenience on me. This particular night the local AM station was re-running an episode of Rush Limbaugh from 21 JAN and tonight Rush was more bombastic than usual.


Following the inauguration Limbaugh took it upon himself to proclaim to the quivering, dejected GOP masses that HE was the only true Republican left and was destined to be the savior of the conservative movement in America. Not only did this clown make the scurrilous claim, but he went on about it for the next 15-20 minutes, or however long it took for me to purchase my badly needed medication. Before I entered the Shoppette he was grousing that he, El Rushbo, was the last line of defense against Obama’s impending holocaust. Already irritated at the painfully stupid assertion of a man who has never held any manner of public office or served his nation, I took my time in browsing the nibbles section and then took about 420 seconds to select and purchase the night’s bottled entertainment (Bacardi 151). As I climbed into my 2002 Stratus, the radio came back on, and to my distinct displeasure, the nit wit, the preening egotist, was still churlishly spouting his drivel.

The Hubris! The Delusion! The utter stupidity of it would boggle the mind of a lesser man, or even perhaps a smart ape. I don’t know what’s worse, the man actually believing he is some sort of paunchy, right-wing messiah, or that the ingrate ejaculated forth his incoherent self-importance for going on thirty minutes. It boggles the mind, how many times he man said I in a segment about someone else. It’s like listening to Bob Dole or Joe Biden on speed…

Perhaps there is nothing that Limbaugh can’t do. It would be worth a Euro to see a contest between Rush and Obama as to who could notionally fix more problems in this country through pure magic. No doubt in his mind Rush is already the savior of the United States, slayer of the vile Clintons and the despoiler of countless big busted models.

At times the man has a point insofar as he can, like any common five year old, point out the obvious. It does not take a genius, a Special Olympics athlete, or even a FSU graduate, to see that a majority of our fellow Americans may have checked their brains at the door when it comes to their dear Obama. However, all men have their limits and today I reached mine. At this moment I would, without any hesitation, punch that SOB straight in his pie hole just so that he would stop polluting the cosmos with his foul screed. I would enjoy it. I would savor it and recall it fondly for years to come as among the highest and best services ever rendered for mankind.